Eliminating food to the bare essentials brings about a stark change in the body's sensations and emotions. The skin feels taut, with each nerve more heightened in awareness. This tightness is coupled with a building undercurrent of energy, one that feels both exhilarating and precariously close to overwhelming. The body, sensing a lack of sustenance, sharpens its instincts, ramping up a primal fight-or-flight response. Waking becomes charged with the urgency of survival, the mind racing as it grapples with an instinctual hunger that is hard to ignore.
In this state, each decision regarding food becomes crucial. Just one or two unplanned items can tip the balance between maintaining focus and succumbing to distraction. A single snack could be the difference between feeling empowered by the restraint or being overwhelmed by cravings. The tension within builds, creating a fragile tightrope walk of discipline and desire, where the stakes feel incredibly high. It’s a complex interplay of mental clarity shackled to the raw edges of hunger, where success is measured not just in physical endurance, but in the steadfastness of will.
I’m at a point where I feel like I’ve regained the strength and if I can only lose the extra pounds to relieve the pressure on my joints, I’ll be able to cross the finish line in August. It’s a razor thin margin, but I’m feeling confident that if I focus on my morning routine alone, I’ll set myself up for success and be able to repeat what I’ve begun to make a habit. It has taken years to put the pieces back into place, and now it’s right in front of me if I can keep it steady.